New Year's Resolutions: Why they work, why they don't
Happy New Year!
Whether you're a fan of the holiday or not, you can't escape it, no matter where you are.
And whether you choose to partake in making resolutions or not, you likely partake to some degree and just don't realize it.
Example: I wasn't trying to make new year's resolutions. It wasn't on my radar at all. However in my year-end-work-progress report that was due right after Thanksgiving I inevitably talked about "goals and ideas for the coming year."
I also found myself jotting down a few things I want to do, professionally, in 2013. I did this on an off day a couple of weeks ago, and again, I didn't say to myself, "What are my new year's resolutions?"
I just did it instinctively.
By the time Dec. 30th rolled around and I was sitting in the SDF airport waiting for the flight back to MIA I gave in. I opened my purse-size notebook and wrote "2013:" underlined, in quotations, semi-colon and all! I had succumbed to the new year's tradition of making a list, resolving to reach goals, some quite attainable, but most rather challenging to follow through with.
The interesting thing: it's 01-03 and I cannot even remember everything on that list. I remember a few things but not all.
Is this why people are so quick to give up on resolutions?
We forget! We get busy, don't follow through the first couple of days or even weeks, get angry or frustrated with ourselves and- give up.
It doesn't feel good to let yourself down. It feels really, really crappy. It creates fear that we may never be capable of following through so, sometimes we just stop trying.
The stars seem too far away so we stop reaching.
It's all perception and the conversation that goes on in your own head though.
There's no reason to give up on your resolutions or dreams, ever.
Really, think about that... is there any reason in the world to give up on a dream?
No. There is not. Period.
So this new year I encourage you to go ahead and make that little list or go back to it and write questions for your resolutions or goals (I'll tell you why in a min.).
Here's one of mine as an example:
New Year's Goal 1-Attend 1 large animal welfare conference
Q: Why should I attend an animal welfare conference?
A:Because it will give me new perspectives on sheltering... new ideas.
A:It will refresh and revitalize me, helping me be a more effective adoption counselor, saving more lives
A:I will meet other people that work in the field and feel the same frustrations, hopes, etc I feel... people that can empathize
Q: How will I pay
A: I will take money from savings if need be. It's an investment
This is just an example and a simple one at that.
The benefit of questioning your resolutions up front is- you're a step ahead of your brain.
Your brain will very sneakily begin to feed you negative messages about your goals and resolutions; you won't even realize it's ... your brain has won and you've given up on your goals.
Regarding the above mentioned resolution my brain has already been telling me (for example), "oh, you have time to book a flight, no rush... that's A LOT of money for you to spend out of your pocket... your employer should just send you to a conference... why should you have to take care of it on your own?... but you'll have to miss work... what if people think you're being a 'show-off' or something going to a conference like you're someone important?..."
This is me being brutally honest with myself and these are little messages my brain has slipped in on me without me even noticing.
It's ingrained in (most) of us from early childhood to question and doubt everything. We learn it from adults at a young age and it's passed on generation to generation.
It takes a lot of work to really 'catch your brain in the act' of breaking you down.
You can do it though.
You have a whole lifetime to master the art of becoming more aware, more sentient, more in tune with the Universal Light; to become enlightened, to be happy, content, confident... in all your goals, resolutions and dreams, and most importantly, within yourself.
Related Affirmation: I am here to be happy. I walk through life easily and effortlessly. All is provided for me in abundance. I am free of struggle. I have faith in myself, life, God. All is as it should be.
Whether you're a fan of the holiday or not, you can't escape it, no matter where you are.
And whether you choose to partake in making resolutions or not, you likely partake to some degree and just don't realize it.
Example: I wasn't trying to make new year's resolutions. It wasn't on my radar at all. However in my year-end-work-progress report that was due right after Thanksgiving I inevitably talked about "goals and ideas for the coming year."
I also found myself jotting down a few things I want to do, professionally, in 2013. I did this on an off day a couple of weeks ago, and again, I didn't say to myself, "What are my new year's resolutions?"
I just did it instinctively.
By the time Dec. 30th rolled around and I was sitting in the SDF airport waiting for the flight back to MIA I gave in. I opened my purse-size notebook and wrote "2013:" underlined, in quotations, semi-colon and all! I had succumbed to the new year's tradition of making a list, resolving to reach goals, some quite attainable, but most rather challenging to follow through with.
The interesting thing: it's 01-03 and I cannot even remember everything on that list. I remember a few things but not all.
Is this why people are so quick to give up on resolutions?
We forget! We get busy, don't follow through the first couple of days or even weeks, get angry or frustrated with ourselves and- give up.
It doesn't feel good to let yourself down. It feels really, really crappy. It creates fear that we may never be capable of following through so, sometimes we just stop trying.
The stars seem too far away so we stop reaching.
It's all perception and the conversation that goes on in your own head though.
There's no reason to give up on your resolutions or dreams, ever.
Really, think about that... is there any reason in the world to give up on a dream?
No. There is not. Period.
So this new year I encourage you to go ahead and make that little list or go back to it and write questions for your resolutions or goals (I'll tell you why in a min.).
Here's one of mine as an example:
New Year's Goal 1-Attend 1 large animal welfare conference
Q: Why should I attend an animal welfare conference?
A:Because it will give me new perspectives on sheltering... new ideas.
A:It will refresh and revitalize me, helping me be a more effective adoption counselor, saving more lives
A:I will meet other people that work in the field and feel the same frustrations, hopes, etc I feel... people that can empathize
Q: How will I pay
A: I will take money from savings if need be. It's an investment
This is just an example and a simple one at that.
The benefit of questioning your resolutions up front is- you're a step ahead of your brain.
Your brain will very sneakily begin to feed you negative messages about your goals and resolutions; you won't even realize it's ... your brain has won and you've given up on your goals.
Regarding the above mentioned resolution my brain has already been telling me (for example), "oh, you have time to book a flight, no rush... that's A LOT of money for you to spend out of your pocket... your employer should just send you to a conference... why should you have to take care of it on your own?... but you'll have to miss work... what if people think you're being a 'show-off' or something going to a conference like you're someone important?..."
This is me being brutally honest with myself and these are little messages my brain has slipped in on me without me even noticing.
It's ingrained in (most) of us from early childhood to question and doubt everything. We learn it from adults at a young age and it's passed on generation to generation.
It takes a lot of work to really 'catch your brain in the act' of breaking you down.
You can do it though.
You have a whole lifetime to master the art of becoming more aware, more sentient, more in tune with the Universal Light; to become enlightened, to be happy, content, confident... in all your goals, resolutions and dreams, and most importantly, within yourself.
Related Affirmation: I am here to be happy. I walk through life easily and effortlessly. All is provided for me in abundance. I am free of struggle. I have faith in myself, life, God. All is as it should be.
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